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How to fire the sheriff 👀 Apr 24, 2025

Wanna hear something sad?

Some folks think they need a cop to serve an eviction notice.

Like it's a scene from Yellowstone and someone's about to get hogtied. 😅

You're not kicking down a door.

You're handing over some paper to an adult (or kid 13+ older).

Know who else does this?

Mailmen.

A...

Read on...
New law takes that away too?? Apr 17, 2025

Tenants lie.

About people.

About pets.

About how they can’t show income, but they “flip four-wheelers on the side.”

That's why credit checks matter.

Hard to fake a 520 credit score.

But remember HB 3564 we mentioned?

It's bad. Real bad.

And banning credit checks is one of the worst parts.

...
Read on...
New law comes for your cash cow Apr 10, 2025

Illinois just slid into your DMs.

It's another new law.

House Bill 3564

And it's not flirting — it's coming for your fees.

If this passes (likely), it'll:

- kill move-in fees

- cap background fees

- limit late rent fees (anything but those!!)

Looks like you couldn't use credit reports too.

...
Read on...
Trash, cocaine, and furnace filters — oh my! Apr 03, 2025

This just happened.

Like, days ago.

Tenant moves out.

A Legal Plan Member did a final walkthrough.

And — boom.

Trash everywhere.

Cocaine on the counter.

Like they were planning one last party... and never showed up.

Then in the closet?

A tower of furnace filters.  Still in the wrapper.

T...

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When cops want your digits Mar 28, 2025

Babe, wake up — the cops are here.

They rolled up like it's Mardi Gras.

But it ain't beads they're after — it's your tenant.

There's a warrant with his name on it.

And now they want your door code to get in.

Whatcha gonna do?

You know what they say:

"Sometimes life hands you lemons, but som...

Read on...
Don't fall for this rent trap Mar 13, 2025

Shower thought:

If your tenant was handy, they wouldn't be renting.

Yet here you are.

Knocking a few bucks off rent for some “easy” repairs.

Next thing you know, their quick fix turns your basement into a waterpark.

And their cousin, the “drywall expert,” disappears faster than your security de...

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Wanna lose $80K? Just threaten this. Mar 06, 2025

You ever wake up and think,

"Man, I’d love to lose $80,000 today?"

No?

Well, one Chicago landlord pulled it off...

He threatened to call ICE on his tenants.

And no, not the kind of ice your cousin sells out the back of a Waffle House at 3 AM.

The immigration folks.

Tenant didn't pay.

Landlor...

Read on...
New roomie? Not so fast, Chad Feb 27, 2025

Here we go again...

You rented to a responsible, gainfully employed adult.

Maybe even checked their credit.

Felt good about it.

Then one day, you swing by for a repair.

Hold up...

Who's this guy?

Scruffy beard.

Hot Pocket in hand.

Dreams big. Pays rent never.

"That's Chad," your tenant say...

Read on...
The law loves kids Feb 20, 2025

Fair housing.

Boring? Yeah.

Important? Also yeah.

You're not out here running a no-tattoos, no funny last names kinda operation.

But fair housing rules?

Not always obvious.

Take kids.

You're fine with good kids.

But you don't want a gang of sugar-fueled banshees treating your rental like a t...

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Your cameras are creeping me out 👀 Feb 13, 2025

"Not in my house."

That’s what Shaq used to say while swatting shots into the fifth row.

It's also what your tenants will say if you try sticking a camera in their house.

And guess what?

They'd be right.

Not pointed at their couch.

Not peeking into the kitchen.

Not checking if they're running...

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Rent don't count after this date Jan 31, 2025

Tenants will try anything.

Dodge rent.

Ignore your 5-Day Notice.

Then, when they're out of options...

Sneak the rent into your bank account hoping it resets the clock.

Yeah... nah.

All the ignored calls.

The "I swear I never got it" texts.

Ain't gonna fly.

If you served it right, their sh...

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Just say 'no thanks' Jan 24, 2025

Don't be nice.

Not when it comes to being a landlord reference.

Sure, the tenant seems lovely.

Paid rent on time.

Mowed the lawn.

Maybe even left you a thank-you note (wild, right?).

But here's the deal:

One kind word could land you in a world of hurt.

Say you tell their new landlord they'...

Read on...
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