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Words you love to hear:
Cold. Hard. Cash.
Let's say a prospective Tenant offers you this, but with a catch...
"I'll pay 3 months rent - in cash - if I can get the keys tonight."
Hmmm...
Is this Tenant a baller (or shady)?
Here's a pro tip to help you decide.
* taps mic *
...
Lock your doors.
There's a thief on the loose.
Wanna guess what they stole?
* drumroll please *
A toilet seat.
Go ahead - rub your eyes and read that again.
A Legal Plan Member had a toilet seat stolen by a rogue Tenant.
We know.
It sounds crazy.
Who in their right mind would steal a...
It all started innocent enough...
A Legal Plan Member called to confirm he was right.
He was showing the Legal Plan to a friend.
Shared how he chats with yours truly (without getting billed).
And that he feels safe using Illinois' most up-to-date lease.
Yada...
So...
Our law firm sees a lot of dumb stuff.
Potty mouth Tenants.
Empty threats from lawyers.
DIY leases (these are the worst!)
But this one is a doozy.
Here's what happened:
A Tenant gets served with an eviction notice for not paying rent.
He then screams:
"This notice is illegal. It...
It started innocent enough.
You made a "For Rent" ad.
Snapped a few pics of the empty house.
Jotted down some pretty words.
Then hit publish...
And a tsunami of dumb questions came in.
"Does no smoking mean vapes?"
"I know you say no pets. But what about my friend's Chihuaua. ...
Say you get this snarky text from a Tenant:
"Yo, my neighbor down the hall was shirtless again! Make him stop or you'll hear from my lawyer."
Ummm...
Let's see here.
* clears throat *
Look, dude...
BRING. IT. ON.
You know the drill.
Ya gotta keep Tenant's safe in "common areas" - if it's...
Ah, the Illinois Supreme Court.
The most connected brightest legal minds in the game.
It's a hard job.
And they mean well.
But sometimes, they can't leave well enough alone...
Case in point:
They spent $60 million to help Tenants pay rent.
We know what you're thinking:
"What's...
Overheard a Tenant's phone call at the coffee shop today:
"Oh, not much. Doing a few chores around the house."
* hears snarky voice on other end *
"Nah, it's cool. My Landlord discounts rent when I help out!"
Hmm...
Appreciate the team spirit, bud.
But it's not smart.
At least for...
It's sad but true:
At some point, a Tenant will break your lease.
And when they do, your next move better be right.
Let's say a Tenant keeps firing up cancer sticks in the home (despite the whole "no smoking" thing).
You would serve them a 10-Day Notice to Quit.
This says what they did...
It's a hassle to find good Tenants.
So when you do, locking them up for a year helps.
But life happens.
Some Tenants get fired.
Others chase big kid money.
Maybe someone *finally* leaves that neurotic ex.
It doesn't matter why.
They're leaving before the lease ends.
Which means you gotta get...
One of the dumbest things we hear from Landlords.
"But, but... it's in the lease!"
Here's the truth:
A great lease stacks the deck in your favor.
But you can't sit by willy nilly hoping the Tenant plays along.
Case in point: furnace filters.
Any killer lease makes the Tenant change...
Pop quiz...
What makes a bad Tenant worse?
* cue Jeopardy music *
A Tic-Tok teenager who thinks rules don't apply to them.
It gets worse...
They're *kinda* right.
The kid didn't sign the lease.
No big deal.
You can't hold a minor to a lease anyway.
But that also means you can't...